okay
anxiety
means i worry and i
chew my cheeks and overthink but
it means
i choke
at the moment of truth i choke
and i will always choke
count on me i’ll
walk off
excuse me for a second please
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Tag Archives: #anxiety
Studies Show Beauty Show
“Studies show attractive people
Are more beautiful than people
(Who think of themselves)
(As unattractive))
.”
“Using a scale of appreciation
(Controlling for this and that)
Confirms what we have always
Suspected
.”
“Beautiful people are (in fact)
Beautiful
(Whenever (and only when)
They (are) attract(ive))
.”
“focus on your breathing for a second”
wound up
in the present
tense – following my air –
with all this awareness my brain
can watch
my breath
my molecules – all mine – until
a fresh, wet present tense
murders the last
then dies
beneath
the fresh, wet grasp
of a new present tense –
when i try to control my breath
i tense
my brain
wound up as if i were a watch
then, without awareness,
my body breathes
for me
daymares
like jealousies
anxieties or grief
haunt like terrible babadooks:
morning
trip
pullstrings
stretch taut across
the walkways and sidewalks –
ready to be tripped across, to
trigger,
and cause
each thought to branch into seven:
two of these thoughts collide,
four thoughts divide,
one dies
–
four dreams
each dividing
till positive feedback –
can an infinite container
contain
objects
of infinitely growing size?
the tetragrammaton
is called panic
attack
Panic Attack
the fear
is a clear aether:
cloying, clinging
like trapped vapor pressing
on my heart with twelve oceans
thoughts: blocks
then grains of peppery static
then stardust: fuzzy logic
my words blur and buzz
like a numb arm on a neon light
sweat evaporates
from me like a desert mirage –
my brain a red anthill,
my mouth breathing instead of my lungs
“my apologies, i just need one
chronic minute, one brief lifetime
for this to pass over”
⨀ 